Issues w/Subscriptions

I must say that the title is a phrase that my BFF Rach (you might wanna check her out on her blog It's all her fault..... *wink* ) said one time and it has caught on like wildfire with us. I mean, what a perfect comeback to someone who tells you that you have issues! Granted the brillance wasn't from me but I happily borrow it from her and continue the spreading of it.

That said, the idea for this post was inspired by my loves me so much husband.

It all started so innocently. He had left to take big kids to school. Meg was still sleeping. I go to living room to watch my Fox4 news and waiting for the Tell It To Tim segment (it's done every Fri if Tim is there. It's viewer comments about news stories or what commentators are wearing etc...). It dawns on me that I need to read my email. But...iPad is charging, our room has no tv so using my comp is not an option. Suddenly I recall hubby has new lap top (a tiny inexpesnsive one that fits his coin collecting/selling need). I go to Pop's office and get that little lap top and plop a spot back in the living room.

It was all going so well til hubby got back home. First thing he does is walk in office and say, "Where's my computer?" I'm smiling to myself and tell him, "I have it in here." He was all like why? I tell him I'm checking my e-mail (really I'm just looking for my blog fix whether it is from comments to my blog or notices of blogs I subscribe to). Then he's all like, um what's wrong with your computer? I inform him that my iPad is charging and  I want to watch TV and there is no TV in our room as he well knows. I also pointed out he regularly kidnaps my iPad for his use and this is only the 2nd time I'm using his comp. That quites him.

Takes me only a few minutes longer to finish up with e-mail checking. I tell him I'm done just let me sign out of my g mail. He tells me to just close it. I tell him he doesn't need my g mail it gets a lot of blog e-mails and some twitter and various other things. He says I have issues. (don't I know it) I say, "My issues have subscriptions baby."

As I'm putting away laundry and making beds (by now Meg is up and eating breakfast) I start to think, is it any wonder I have issues with subscriptions?

I mean we are now living with his parents.

My lovely dogs are being forced to stay outside in the backyard. Why? Because Daisy has happy pee issues and wouldn't be fair to let Casey stay in and leave Daisy alone. (not that I would, they're sisters and almost always together) Everytime I clean up Coco mess (MIL dog) I wonder why mine can't be in because of the pee issue but Coco is free to poo/pee in house with no consequences. I take her out regularly so it's not that. She even deigns to tell me when she needs to go most of the time. Her pee don't bother me. IT's the poo. That dog doesn't eat dog food. She eats weenies or ham mixes w/dog food (very little) or what mom is eating. Thus her poo often is of the loose (very loose) kind.

His mom is very OCD bout her house and everything must be perfectly cleaned at all times. I'm talking, like no toys spread out all over the place. So when evening comes and it's time for people to start getting home I and the kids go on a mad pick up the toys before anyone gets home yes I know it's not bed time yet dash. I feel like I spend less quality time with them because I spend so much more time cleaning and doing laundry. For this effort, I get rewarded with weekends off. So my kids only get my full attention 2 days a week? I'm sure there's little moments I don't even think about that they'll remember forever. I hope they do. Cause I feel like I'm not being the mom I want to be right now. I grew up w/single dad for years and was ignored by step mom 2 except when she was getting on my case bout something. (that's another story, really) So I knew as a mom I wanted to be more. I wanted my kids to know that I made time for them even if it meant putting off the dishes or some other chore. I sit down and take part in there silly to me discussions.

Then there's the BIL! He could drive a saint insane. Some days he's nice and fun to be round others his like Grumpy Bear on steroids and definitely not as cute and cuddly! Complains about noise kids make (this just in kids make noise to make them be quiet 24/7 is most impossible and wrong!) noise. Don't stay out late on Fri and Sat night and complain they woke you at 10an with their noise. I'm sorry, I keep them calm and quiet as long as possible on Saturday mornings but by mid morning, forget about it. Not to mention BIL loves to complain bout how far our car is parked in drive. Could you please pull closer to the garage, I don't want my truck in street. PALEEEASE! This from the guy who frequently parks his truck diagnonally cross the drive, not caring if anyone else can get out or in the drive. My car ain't new. It's a 94 Buick. I don't mind parking it in the street as I usually have to so we don't play merry go round cars too often.

Add to all the above that hubby is currently unemployed. The only money he makes is what little he gets from selling coins he bought way cheap God knows when. I know he's doing his best to find work. I know he could take a job at fast food joint or some other such place but we know the reality is that wouldn't be near enough. Then theres the worry about his glass ankles. One he just twisted (or maybe tore ligament) few weeks ago. That could affect getting hired somewhere, couldn't it?

And then there's Sean. Who delights in saying boobs every chance he gets. I'm sure it's all attention getting shock mommy to her toes stuff but still, he is 9! I tucked him in last night and when I said Good Night God Bless he said I just can't stop thinking bout boobs. I so wanted to bang my head in the nearest wall and then sit and cry. Instead, I went out back and gave dogs their meds. I sat awhile petting and talking to them. Missing them because they're not part of my in house life anymore and now I have to make time for them too. That leads to wondering if Sean would sleep better and not need to come sleep in our floor if Casey and Daisy (he's her boy) could sleep in the same room as him. Daisy used to sleep wherever Sean was. Even if he moved from his bed to the couch or the recliner. I wonder if some of his acting out is caused by the loss of Daisy in the house. Nothing I can do bout that but still...

I am grateful we are able to live here. Not free, we contribute but still it's a home. So don't get me wrong. I've kind of adjusted to the whole my life fits in one room thing. Though I do long for the day where I have space to put my things. The day where if I feel like doing light housework I won't feel guilty cause it's not perfectly presentable at all times clean. Living with 3 people who aren't used to the chaos a house of 3 kids and 2 dogs can bring. A house where I once again rule and don't feel judged or watched all the time. Grateful for friends like Rach who I can really talk to and say anything with no fear of not being understood. Who understand what some of it's like cause she's living it too or lived it.

So even though my issues may have subscriptions, in the end I'm still me and I have lots to be thankful for.