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Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Wannabe OCD Senses Get Triggered

I know, I shouldn't but little things get to me. Make my wannabe OCD senses tingle and go into overload. I'm not just talking your every day run of the mill someone didn't clear the microwave timer. No, it's more nerve wracking than that.

It's common sense stuff. And surprise surprise it's the same repeat offenders. 3 of them on any given day can be kids under the age of 18. 2 of them are frequently people over the age of 18. Both should know better. Hubs falls into that category. Well, maybe he just stumbles into it every so often and he's always sorry he did. By which I mean, I say something to him and he apologizes for said offense. BIL on the other hand, takes people for granted. Like hey, I live with Mom and she'll take care of it OR hey! sometimes it just magically gets done. (the magic being either myself or Mom taking care of it.)

The kids are learning and most of the time they do know better. If they leave something laying in the floor I asked or that they know shouldn't have been left I take them to it and point. Sometimes I may verbally remind them. But they know and attempt to clean up after themselves and are still learning.

Hubs used to be better about it til we moved into the in-laws and then well, ya know. He started slipping. So rather than yell at him about or gripe about it, I've learned a new tactic. One I should've learned long ago but well, didn't. Now, I just mention it to him or he sees me cleaning up something (like clothes left in the floor or wherever) and he says something like sorry didn't mean to do it. I can't make too much hulabaloo about it, after all it's his folks we live with.

I cannot however take this same tack with the BIL. Nope. And I know that Mom taught them both better. Trouble is, just as a Mom of youngins, she sometimes just does it cause it's easier. Easier than telling your 30 year old son to take care of his crap. Heaven help the woman who finally gets him. I shudder to think what his place would look like w/o magic elves going about tidying up what he leaves behind.

But then, there's also the case of BIL bitching if the dishwasher wasn't emptied or him putting dirty dishes into just cleaned dishes cause he didn't stop to asses whether the dishes were in fact dirty. Ya know, cause it's impossible to tell if someone like a kid has gotten a cup and left the latch undone. Or not notice you had to unlock the dishwasher to put your dirty dishes in. Or just think that no one got to putting away the dishes fast enough and now you are inconvenienced to have to do so.

So here's my list of things that drive me crazy that may or maybe not should.

1) Taking dirty non washed clothes out of the washer and throwing them on the floor and putting in your clothes to wash.  ~ Is it really so difficult to grab a basket from the hall closet to put them in OR put them in the basket that is already in the hall?

2) Picking up the bath mat after you shower AND cleaning up your water mess? ~ Hello! I am expected to clean up or make sure the kids have done so after shower, shouldn't you? Got news for you, magic elves do not pick up that mat and clean your water dripping cause you were not clever enough to get a towel before getting in the shower.

3) IF you happen to toss clothes at the basket in the hall way and MISS, how about picking them up? ~ Magic elves do not do this either! You know you missed the basket, don't let the rest of know you're a lousy shot. PICK IT UP!

3a) IF you do start some of your own laundry please remember to move it from washer to dryer. ~ Again, no magic elves. Some of us are nice enough to do it for you but it'd be nice if you tried to remember.

4) Don't complain about our noise when your tv or computer game can be heard from anywhere in the house. ~ Seriously!

5) If you choose to stay out late and sleep in DON'T expect me to keep my kids quiet all damn day long til you deign to rise. ~  Some day, Lord willing, you will have kids and you will know how futile this is. I may not say I told you so but I may laugh if/when this occurs.

5a) If you do stay out late, how about keeping the noise down. ~ You wake my kids, you are either watching them til they drop again or you are putting them back to bed.

6) Don't yell and curse at my dog! ~ Seriously, just like my kids if you have a problem you come see me. If my dog is silly enough to think you care that she is happy you are home, just keep walking and she'll let you be, probably. Really, just tell her down or go lay down. It could work. Also, no yelling at Mom's dog either.

7) Don't get all pissy if my dog or Mom's dog makes a mess in your room if you leave your door open. ~ I can't be home all day long every day and sometimes, just like kids, dogs have accidents. (sometimes accept that you have ticked them off and they are letting you know.)

8) Don't assume you know how to parent/handle my kids IF you AREN'T a parent or work with kids daily! ~ This goes double if you think you understand better how to handle my son than me. He's got legitimate medical issues (aka behavior and mood problems), what's your excuse?

9) Don't complain about what we make for dinner! ~ If you are not willing to provide a meal, whether you make it or order it, for 8 people DON'T gripe when it's not what you wanted or like. We don't have to feed you but we include you. Plus, there's the remote possibility we think leftovers would be okay.

10) IF you must leave your iced drink on the counter/table put it on napkin. ~ Ya know, cause there's no coasters for the counter or table.

10a) IF you have food or drink in the living room please clean it up when you are done. ~ You don't like it if someone else leaves trash/dishes in the living room, don't be a bad example.

11) Yeah, that microwave timer gets to me. ~ Just clear it. Not hard.

12) Keep your scissors away from my girls hair and don't take them to get their hair cut. (Okaying it with Hubs is not acceptable. He has no clue.) ~ Seriously! Between you trimming their bangs and the one or two people you/I paid to cut their hair, their bangs are all messed up. Yes, their hair looks horrid if not fixed. It's in the annoying process of growing out. I know you are just trying to help but in this case you're not. There is a reason why some of what looks like bangs is longer than what is bangs. I have one stylist I trust who is fully able to cut/trim the girls hair. Thank you. (clearly this one is a Mom thing and not a BIL or Hubs thing)

So, I'm complaining. Yes. But I really see it as therapeutically venting. It keeps me from going insane. What drives your wannabe or legitimate OCD senses into overdrive? Is this OCD or just pet peeves? Is there much difference between the two? Let me know.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Who's 8?

So, the 14th was my Bridgette's 8th birthday. I have no idea where the years have gone.

Suddenly she is so big and smart and well, talented. She reads very well, just as she should. But what is more amazing to me is how well she draws and really, she always has. She started at about age 3 tracing her toy ponies. We just keep encouraging her in little ways. You know, by providing supplies to draw/color with or on. Hanging up her art work. (we actually hang up all the kids random art and replace it when they give us new ones) Last year for Christmas, I believe, we bought her a how to draw horses book. She's used it so much she's had to tape it. That's right, she taped it back together. I just randomly found it one day. Smart I tell ya.

Dragons are her new thing

We took her to Fudruckers on Friday for her Birthday Dinner. We gave our presents that night but forgot to take pictures of her opening them. So, I took pictures when we got home. I figured better to let her have something to open on her birthday and a few less things we would need to bring back from her party on Sunday.

Princess Cadance from My Little Pony Friendship is Magic

New NIV Bible cause the one she got when going into Kindergarten has been put up a little too well.  And hey! It has a horse on it. Perfect.

New bracelet w/a cross inside a butterfly.

Speaking of her party on Sunday. Hubs decided it needed to be at Chuck E Cheese. We usually just go to our local Peter Pipers where most of us agree the pizza is much better. So to Chuck E Cheese we went. Hadn't been there in years. Turns out they redesigned it. Too bad they didn't overhaul their craptastic pizza. BUT the kids all had fun, so that's really all that matters. Me being ill today from the pizza not agreeing with me, small price to pay. Though I did notice 2 of my 3 kids really didn't eat any pizza at all. So, on the ride home we stopped at McDs drive thru. Poor Meg was so wore out she insisted on being carried, I gave in. The whole way to McDs all we heard was Meg saying, "I'm tired. I'm thirsty. I'm hungry."

Bridge did a really good job of talking and playing with everyone. She didn't even flip out too much when Big Brother Sean decided to help her blow out her candles before she did. We just relit the candles and she blew them out. No big.

Waiting to blow out the candles

Brother did what?! He blew them out before she could. Relit them and went on.

Cake before candle lighting.

When opening presents she genuinely loved everything she got and took the time to read the cards! She also thanked everyone. I had little prodding to do to remind her to say thanks. That makes me so proud. Really.

Dream Lites that matches her Pillow Pet

Jewelry kit

Card she noticed after she took out the DVD.

Cool horse shirt w/bible verse on it

We <3 Veggie Tales!

A Doodle Book for Girls

A binder of how to draw various things w/plain paper put together for her by my BFF! She loved this! 

Fleecy blanket. No more stealing mine.

Lava Lamp = Super Cool!

Although, I would like to point out that letting your kid blow a whistle inside Chuck E Cheese is not a good idea. Hey! It's loud enough in their with kids playing, crying, screaming, and what not, we really don't need to hear an annoying whistle, too.

Big kudos and loves to my BFF and to Hubs who allowed B's fake snakes from the prize counter be lost/have some horrid unfortunate accident. Even Aunt Julia tried to talk her out of getting them. She and I think alike about those awful fake snakes. *shudder*

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Rough Seas, Boat Still Afloat

Sean came home this past Monday. He had been doing well in the hospital. Meds were adjusted/changed. Had a splendid hour off the unit. We asked if he could come home on Monday so that the transition back to regular school might go smoother.

I'd really like to say that all is smooth and lovely but it's not. I'm sure that would not be the answer anyone with any sense would expect me to say. Unless, of course, I didn't want to talk about it or anything. It's been rocky to say the least.

Last night looked like it could go off the charts ballistic. It didn't help that I was already not handling my frustration of the day well at all. By the time the kids got into the truck from the parent pick up line I was on the border of crazy. Add 3 kids instantly all whining about this or that and it was going downhill fast. I got home and put myself in time out. Sean had lost a school library book and it was stolen by his sister. Forget trying to talk him out of that. He was adament Meg took it. Meg screehing her innocence. Bridge upset that how dare Meg get her box of chocolate for the school fundraiser and I should have known it was her permission slip not Meg's. Forget the fact that getting another slip would be easy. UGH! After the trip home and the ages long episode of insanity in the kitchen, I yelled "I'm going to time out!"

Brilliant example. Of how not to act. Got that all settled and worked out and then came dinner. HOLY COW what a mess that was becoming. I couldn't wait for it to be over and kids in bed. Which thank the good Lord went blissfully smooth without incident. While I might not have been on my game after school, dinner was much better. Hubs was there to back me up and even though he too was clearly grouchy we got it done.

I think Sean's meds are right or at least close to it. He seems less agitated and I guess more focused. But really, the focus thing is something they'd notice at school. So far so good. I do worry a bit about it seems he is more fidgety than usual but that he can sit in a spot for a bit and pays attention when you talk. Also, worried about this new thing the hospital mentioned that Sean was showing signs of fitting into, PDD or Pervasive Developmental Disorder. Not sure what that all is but we are finding out about it. Basically, it's Sean is physically 10 but in someways he's more like 5 or younger.

The best thing seems to be that so far we are a team around here. We all understand that it's not going to roses every day and that some days the ones that handle it the best are going to falter and need extra back up and maybe even understanding. Hubs had already been in touch with the school about setting up an ARD Meeting to discuss a better plan for this based on our new knowledge and concerns. That's usually something I would think to do. But before the dust could settle on getting him home, Hubs had put that into action. Not something he would normally do. I think even BIL is understanding that he has a role to play here, too. The role of involved Uncle. He sat down Tues evening and helped Sean and Bridge play Battleship with the special deck of cards. He sat there in the living room floor for over 30 minutes. It was awesome and made my day. I bragged about it to Hubs, a friend, and Mom. I hope BIL continues to do those sorts of things. Later that same evening we (Hubs, me, kids) played Uno Attack. A SUPER BIG HIT! Even Hubs enjoyed the several rounds we played and he was the one to say it was a hit!

Maybe last night was about each individuals frustrations and then the being told no friends houses and no games tonight. I was fixing dinner and cleaning up the kitchen floor (MIL used a spray cleaner on the floor that was too soapy and Daisy is in heat soo....) for the millionth time. The friends house thing is something that scares the shit out of me. The girls have friends they want to play with but who don't ask to if they can play or if they can play here. Sean has few friends and really doesn't handle social things well. Plus, all these kids get to play violent video games and we have done away with those. Our failed experiment of seeing if those could be an outlet. Yes, I know all the lectures on that. No, not every kid is the same. Blah blah blah... Moving forward. I worry that he can't say no or that he does and then a fight happens. Ya know?

All in all, we are still finding our way. Really no different than any other family. We just have a few extra things we struggle with. I still know we are okay. We are still a family and we all love each other even if we are made as hornets at each other. I know we are not going to let it keep us down or define us. Our sea may be rocky but our boat is still afloat.